How did you meet God, David? Did you find him through religion, through custom, or did He come to you in another way?
There were always prayers, Mummy taught me the Angel’s Prayer and the Lord’s Prayer and they told me stories from the Bible, about our Lord Jesus Christ, how He was born, at every religious holiday they explained to me why things happened the way they happened and I always asked and wanted to know. This was like training for me.
But one Christmas Eve, in 2002, I looked out the window and I saw the icon of the Savior. I won’t forget for as long as I live. That I saw Our Lord Jesus through the window.
We never said many prayers in our family, not at the table or in other situations, but we always thanked God for what we had. We didn’t always go to church, it was far away and we didn’t have a car. We weren’t even allowed at some point because my dad was a member of the party. We had to go to school on Saturdays, that was done on purpose so that we wouldn’t attend Sunday Palm service. The children were baptized by a priest at night, in secret. You didn’t go to church out of obligation.
There are people who stay away from church, but they are believers, and that is not wrong. The church is a mechanism. You don’t like it, you don’t go. But the state of mind you get from a Holy Mass, you can’t get it at home. The Mass is the holiest thing our Lord left us. That is where you find peace, then and there. There is no talking in church. No gossip. Sometimes I even feel like stopping reading from religious books in church, but I don’t want to get anyone upset. David is now a cantor in the church in Uzdin.
God’s hand is everywhere. When I go to church, I come back a different man. I calm down. But people should respect the house of God.
We often lose God in our lives, sins and mistakes weigh us down, but He knows EVERYTHING. Why hide something that He knows about anyway. God is about Unconditional Love.
Sometimes I forget to cross myself in church, but we are all human, we make mistakes. And God speaks to us.
My cousin was seriously ill during the COVD pandemic, and I decided to pray for him alone in church, to ask God to spare him. I felt I could help him more this way. I was crying, praying on my knees for my cousin’s health and the candle I had kept going out. And I kept lighting it. And the third time it went out, I asked God to forgive me if I was asking for something that couldn’t be done. His will be done. And yes, my cousin died. And so did his father. But the moment shook me to my core, I was powerless against God’s will.
I hope one day David will be a priest in the house of God. That’s where he belongs. That will be a church I will go to, and it will do good to my soul. It will be quiet.
Photo credit: Diana Bilec
English translation: Cristina Chira